Do you have ass envy?

Every woman on the planet, at some point or another, has has a body part that if given enough permission, money and the right plastic surgeon, would change ASAP.

My select body part was always my tush and I used to compare my butt against every other woman’s I saw.

I had an entire list of how my butt was “supposed” to be.  I wanted it smaller and firmer, flatter and higher.  I dreamt of the day my bubble butt was replaced by what can only describe as a firm pancake.  Now I know women pay doctors handsomely for round behinds but for me, the flat ass was where it was at.  And so I’d walk down the street, on the lookout for my ideal butt and when I saw it, would shoot a fiery, jealous look at its owner.

I’d make up all kinds of stories about this “perfectly”-bootied woman and how she must have the most amazing boyfriend, a fantastic family, always sit her pancake ass in first class and, most importantly, she must adore herself and be constantly happy.   That’s a lot of storytelling to come from one glance at someone’s backside and each time I did it I felt disgusting, as if I had trudged through a mile of manure.

This kind of mental merry-go-round lasted a solid 2 decades until I began to hate the feeling of comparison more than the shape of my butt.   I hated the sickness I felt in the pit of my stomach every time I thought ill of some unassuming woman who was probably perfectly lovely.  She didn’t deserve the venom I shot her way and I certainly didn’t deserve the “my body’s not good enough and never will be so just give up now” beratement that always followed such jealousy.

And, most importantly, my storytelling was completely untrue.  I had no idea what kind of life any of the women I compared myself to led and the harshness I bestowed upon them was always turned on myself.

There is a wonderful Plato quote that reads:

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

True true true.

I also believe that to fully inhabit kindness you must first start with yourself...and that one body part.

How?

The next time you shoot an envious glance in someone’s direction say:

“May she love her body as much as I am learning to love my own.”  TWEET THIS.

This phrase grants you both permission to be kind, not just to each other but to yourself as well.

Today, you are not the sum of your ass, your arms, your thighs or your stomach.

Today, you are sum of the incredible kindness you conjure for yourself and share with every other woman walking down the street.

Biggest love,

Jamie